The Gatekeeper of Miami Heat Culture

Udonis Haslem strikes fear in your heart before you even speak to him. The Miami Heat’s well-traveled enforcer and keeper of the fabled Heat Culture has been the heart and soul of the franchise for two decades, winning a trio of titles since 2006 and helping convince LeBron James to come to South Beach. He’s also the guy who, at this stage of his career, plays only a few minutes a night but still gets ejected because he almost beat up an opposing player in crunch time.

Haslem is entering his 19th season in Miami—only Dirk Nowitzki and Kobe Bryant have spent longer with a single franchise. He’s found a second life as a player by doing a bit of child-rearing for the Heat’s younger stars and holding superstars accountable, effectively serving as an on-floor coach under Erik Spoelstra.

From his home in Dade County, Haslem talked Miami Heat history with GQ: The time when he learned what it’s like to be LeBron, the time he thought he might have to tase Shaquille O’Neal, his belief in Tyler Herro, and what Heat Culture really means.

GQ: I know you recently lost your father. Condolences, Udonis. How are you and your family holding up?

Udonis Haslem: I’m hanging in there, man. It’s a process. My dad was my best friend. I stand in a real particular lane in Miami: South Florida cares a lot about football and a lot of guys come from out of town in the offseason and stay here for basketball. Most guys that play here don’t live here. And then all the guys I played with that I grew bonds with, like Dwyane Wade, just moved away. So, my father was someone I was really close to, that I leaned on a lot for a lot of situations and things. We're gonna continue to work and get through this. And, luckily, he built me for this. I’m built for whatever’s coming before me. I’m ready to sit at the head of the table and lead my family and do everything I have to do.

So, how did you make the decision to even come back to the Miami Heat?

Everything I’ve been doing these last couple years has been selfish. I coulda quit a long time ago. But there’s [always] been another guy that comes in that reminds me of me: that wants an opportunity, that needs an opportunity, that deserves an opportunity. Every year I can find another Udonis Haslem that walks in that locker room. And I’m re-inspired and re-energized. I still have game to give. I still have my passion. I see those guys walk in the locker room and I’m just reborn again. It goes to the Bam Adebayos and Tyler Johnsons and the habits we create in this organization.

Once you come in, you gotta fall in line. And I’m the person you gotta see. And I take that seriously. There’s an expectation here and a standard. For me, that’s always been about everybody else. What do I get outta this? 20 years. If I can get 20 years it’ll be an amazing career for a kid that no one thought would play in the league. All my sacrifices, everything I’ve given, the only thing I’ve asked for is to try to get to 20. I wanna give that to myself, and I wanted to give it to my father.

Who are the guys now that remind you of you?

I continue to work hand and hand and encourage and push Bam. Once you leave [the Heat], I still keep in contact with you. I’m still talking to these guys: Dion Waiters, James Johnson and Tyler Johnson, all these dudes. I still keep in touch and check they temperature. I still pull they card when I see them on TV actin’ a fool and they ain’t handlin’ they business right! I still do that! Because it matters. It matters.

Are you talking about D-Wade or someone else?

He done lost his damn mind. He’s inked up like a subway in Harlem now. He done got all these damn tats. I couldn’t pay that man to get a damn tattoo when he was playin’ here. Couldn’t pay ‘em to get one! Now he ‘bout to catch up with me. But as the season starts, I’m sure I’ll have to get on somebody ass. I’m sorry, am I allowed to say that? Yeah, I’ma get on somebody ass! It’s just how it is, it’s a standard.

Like I tell people all the time: I don’t care if it’s here or somewhere else, Heat Culture? The things you learn here? You can apply them to other teams and aspects of your life. Because it is successful. It’s proven to be. Most people don’t want to be held accountable or to a standard every single day. Most people don’t wanna do that shit...Now, Heat Culture aint’ for everybody. It ain’t for everyone, I understand that. There’s guys that have been here that have hated this shit. They’ve hated being held to a standard, to work hard every single day, they’ve hated what it takes. I’m okay with that. I’m not for everybody.

Anybody who comes in the locker room gotta see you first, right? What does that actually mean in Miami?

I hold that standard. I’m the OG. I control the locker room. Pretty much, [Erik Spoelstra] gives me the reins to run [the team]. He trusts me, it’s a trust we’ve built over the years. He leads and I bring up the rear. Everything in between, we handle: Weights, body fat, conditioning, extra shots, two on two games upstairs, we have a standard. Every day before a game: it’s me and Jimmy Butler playing one on one upstairs [in the facility]. The young guys who are not in the rotation play two on two or three on three. You’re expected to fall in line with these things when you get here.

This started with the Big Three [Lebron James, Wade and Chris Bosh]. If you think about them, they were the Big Three for a reason. The Little 12 were expendable. Our asses get moved around like dominoes. It’s hard to get in a rhythm, even for veteran guys who have been in a system where they played 20 or 30 minutes a night. So we started these games upstairs for the rejects [laughs] on game days and it kept going. When you walk in this locker room and you working for minutes, or you not in rotation, you’re expected to fall in line.

Anything else?

There’s a couple of other things: we don’t believe in being disrespectful here. This is the Dog Pound. Everybody’s a man here. You can’t talk to nobody crazy here. I know in other situations and organizations, if you’re a superstar you say what you wanna say and act how you want to act. It’s a level playing field here. You gotta be accountable to what you say and how you act around here. And I hold that! I hold that. There’s no disrespectin’ no other man around here.

You’ve mentioned accountability a lot. How is it that you’ve run the locker room with so many stars that have come through Miami in recent years? How does it work for you when it comes to managing these high-paid players?

I’m the bodyguard, that’s how. When you come to Miami, you need me [laughs]. No matter what. I don’t care who you are or who you working with. You need me when you come to this city. Everybody knows when they come in to tap in with OG outta respect and outta love. That’s the same thing if I come to somebody else's city or team, I’m tappin’ in too. So people understand when they come to this team, it’s my team and I’m the captain, plus this is my city. OG gonna always make sure you straight around here, no matter what. That’s what it’s been: it don’t have to be the guy who’s paid the most. We teach leadership at all levels here. And I’m molding leaders that come after me...It’s pretty much said, when you step in the Heat locker room you fall in line with OG. I wasn’t given that, I earned that.

So….the obvious question then is: what happens when somebody doesn’t fall in line?

Well….I done tried to kill a few muhfuckas in here for sure! They had to break it up! I ain’t sayin’ no names! They know who they is. I done had to put my hands on some people before! It’s just what it is.

Really?

Listen man: I want the best outta you and I want the best for you. And, sometimes, these kids don’t understand that. It’s not about me anymore. But, I want it so bad for you, that it feels like it for me. And I’m willing to beat yo’ ass to get you to understand that. I don’t wanna have to but...you know what I mean, it’s a difference between the kids today and the kids of my day. We were challenged, we worked hard, we grew up in the era of the basic bums and the runaways. We had grit. These kids nowadays wearing Balenciaga at 14 years old. You know? It’s not the same grit. Now, the talent of these kids? It’s unmatched. They’re way more talented than we were. It’s not even close. But the grit, the push and the will?

You’re saying there’s gotta be more heart involved?

Yeah, man. And sometimes there’s a disconnect. I hate to see young kids come in this locker room and program and have all the talent in the world but they missing [heart]. They don’t wanna listen. That’s when I get mad and wanna jump on you [slams fist into hand]. You got the talent and everything, God gave you it all. You just being disrespectful.

How does the Udonis Haslem School of Hard Knocks apply to a young player like Bam Adebayo?

I recognized Bam was going to be different the first time he fell into those two on two games. He approached those games real violently for a young fella. Most of the time, I’m that guy taking them real seriously. When you come into the Heat culture, and you’re a young guy, you’re expected to do that. This is on top of all the other shit you gotta do here...I knew early he was gonna be a muhfucka!

The thing that impressed me most about Bam is the type of person and kid he was. Way different than the other 19 and 20 year olds that have come in here. Way different. His maturity level, the respect, he’s just different. I really value and appreciate the relationship he has with his mother, and I lost my mom 12 years ago. And you only get one mom, bro. I’ve seen many kids get into this situation and their mom will be their mom, but it’ll start being about a lot of other women once they get that money.

On the other side of that: you have Jimmy Butler, who is either beloved or hated depending on which fan base you ask. How has he fit in Miami to you?

Easy transition. You gotta be held accountable for the shit you do. Other people, they don’t like that. But Jimmy gonna hold you accountable for the shit you say, and the shit you do. Everybody don’t like that. But, we encourage that here. You put a dog in the kennel then he gonna fit right in. He came right where he needed to be. You put a cat in this kennel, and it won’t work out the same way. Jimmy is right where he needed to be, everybody aint’ for Jimmy, but he’s perfect here. We encourage the dog in him, we encourage confrontation, but being respectful with it.

We teach eye-to-eye communication. We don’t put our heads down in here and talk about people and walk away. There’s no solution there. You see people in the NBA doing that shit all the time, puttin’ they head down and talkin’. Who the hell you talkin’ too?! Where is yo’ message goin besides yo’ feet? That’s something that might make others uncomfortable, but not here. We trying to get to solutions, we only got a minute and a half for the timeout. I don’t got time for you to be mumbling at yo’ toes and shit.

And this is from the top down? This is from Pat Riley, the Arisons, Spo? Everybody is saying that this is how the Miami Heat get it done?

They give me the keys and they trust me. And I handle it. There’s no doubt in their minds...I’ve earned this respect and I take it very seriously. I’m 41 years old, man. I walk in the locker room and I’m 223 pounds and have six percent body fat. I don’t have to be six percent body fat if I don’t want to. I don’t have to do none of this shit. But it’s a standard, dog. How the hell do I tell Markeiff Morris or anybody that we need them to lose weight, or get in shape, and this is the standard, if I’m not that? I can’t talk that shit like that if not. I tell people in here all the time: you have to evolve, you don’t have to change...when you walk in here you have to evolve, you have to change, you have to pivot, you can’t be the same player you was somewhere else dog, because that ain’t gonna work here.

How did these famed two on two’s and three on three scrimmages before games start? You said LeBron James and Wade and Bosh got it going?

Yeah but those superstar motherfuckers never had to play, dog. They didn’t have to worry about none of that shit! It was guys like me, Rashard Lewis, James Jones, Mike Miller, and Eddie House. That’s how it started. And I’m the last one left of those guys, everybody is retired and gone. When they left and the new generation came in that would be in the rotation at some point and they weren’t there yet, or our [G-League] guys came in, I took it upon myself to take them upstairs to play.

It’s a psychology to that, of feeling like a player. Because sometimes you could be in this league 10 years or 20 years and you sit on the goddamn bench some nights and you don’t feel like a player. And when you get out there, it feels foreign. So, we work on the psychology of basketball, go up there and just hoop. We ain’t runnin’ no plays. Act like you at the park. Have fun, enjoy it and do all the shit that you work on that coach ain’t gonna let yo ass do in the game...we found out that when those guys got the opportunity to play? They played better. Even if you sat for 35 minutes outta 48, when you got in those last 10 or 12 minutes you played better, you felt better.

One player comes to mind as you bring up all of these ideologies and sports science methods the Heat have used the last few seasons: Tyler Herro. Massive talent, but doesn’t always crack the rotation. How do you bring him along with your brand of tough love?

Oh man, he’s a tough kid. He’s tougher than a lot of people think. He wants the tough love, actually.

Really?

I tiptoed around it a few times, but he said, “Nah, OG. I ain’t soft.” He wants it. I give him that. I wasn’t sure about him. I saw him play in college. He’s not soft at all. Just needed to get stronger. He has the will, has the passion, has the right mindset. He just wasn’t physically there yet. People forget he was 19 years old. And regardless of how well he played offensively, he was still only 19. A lot of people took advantage of that, and, rightfully so...a lot of people took it upon themselves to put [Herro] in a lot of actions and beat him up out there. But offensively? I’ve never seen a kid be able to do what he was able to do at 19 or 20 years old. But, hell yeah: he can take it. He definitely can take it. He part of the Dog Pound now. OG love you to death. But I will be brutally honest wit’ yo’ ass, boy.

He said recently that he deserves to be in the same conversation as Luka Doncic and Trae Young and the other young stars of the NBA. Is that what you’ve seen?

Facts. He just hasn’t been given the keys. He came to a team that’s been successful and didn’t need a superstar right away...he came into a different situation. But skillswise, talent wise, damn right. Them other boys ain’t been to the Finals yet, and that’s not to knock them, but you see what [Herro] did. Boy got game. Straight up and down. And if he was on a team, probably not a good team, and he got to go out there and do his thing? Damn right he’d be in those conversations.

What exactly is “Heat Culture?” As someone who’s the architect of it, how would you explain it?

It’s a lifestyle, bro. You can’t just tap in when the season start and tap back out when it’s over. That’s how yo ass get hurt next year in training camp. You pretty much have to stay in shape year around...Heat Culture is discipline, accountability, work ethic and enjoying somebody else’s success.

What does that look like when it’s put into practice though, not just beliefs and credos?

Suicides. We have a conditioning test where you run five 10s and you have a minute. You start on the baseline (he begins counting to 10 back and forth) and you go up and back. You get two minutes rest and then you do it again. We do that five times. Nobody else in the league can do that. No one’s doing that. And it has nothing to do with basketball: it’s all mental. We just want to see who is going to push and who’s going to break. It’s not basketball at all, you are not doing that in games. It’s a mental test. We don’t want no mental midgets and we don’t need energy vampires. We do that before we even start training camp.

Everyone has a different way they like to work out. I’m a guy who works out pretty much all year around. I put together workouts for all the guys. We all work out together. We do it outside and on the football field. I’m old, so I change up my workouts and get creative about them. I know other guys are doing different things, but come to my workout. Let’s get outside. Let’s get grimy. Let’s get dirty. I know basketball players: they like air conditioning, they wanna be inside, they wanna sit...I make a point to get in the trenches with you, I get in the mud with you. I make a point to do that. Heat Culture is also caring about people outside of the game of basketball: I know Tyler Herro’s dad. When Tyler Herro’s female friend, or girlfriend, I don’t know what they call they girlfriends nowadays.

How about “his lady”?

Right! When Tyler Herro’s lady got pregnant, he called me. Heat Culture isn’t just basketball. I give a fuck about you...I was honored that I was one of the first people he told. These dudes call me on so much shit, man.

Did he ever call you for tips for being in a music video?

What?

I know you heard the song.

The Jack Harlow song?

Yeah.

I fucks wit’ Jack Harlow! I reposted that. Jack Harlow can spit. He ain't’ call me for no tips on the video, though. I been in different kinds of videos. I been in “I’m So Hood.” The production budget probably wasn’t that high when I was in those videos.

How did the 2006 Championship climb go with Wade, Shaq and the other guys? How’d you bring the first championship to Miami?

I’ll never forget: Dan Le Batard did an article about me in high school. I was one of the best players in Dade County and Dan loved me in high school and I loved Dan. And as soon as we got Shaq he did another article about me. I was like, “Damn, Dan!” It was a completely different article: Shaq ain’t never won with a center next to him, Haslem has no experience, can he play next to Shaq with the expectations….man, Shaq played with Travis Knight. You called me out and you Travis Knight slide?! I’d tear Travis Knight’s ass up! C’mon Le Batard.

So, immediately I was motivated. Shaq ain’t even got here and I was pissed off. All this other shit you coulda wrote about, all these other sorry guys Shaq played with, but you wanna write about me?! I was happy, though, because I was a fan of Shaq. The playing field had been raised and expectations were higher.

And that moment set the tone for you for the season?

It became a big deal and big business. I learned a lot. That was around the time when NBA players got paid for parties. We had Antione Walker, Gary Payton, Shaquille O’Neal and D-Wade. It was liable to be four parties in one city! Everybody was getting a bag! The main thing about Shaq was him telling us to “enjoy this shit, but when it’s time to work, it’s time to work.” Those guys knew how to get to work, obviously.

Then you have “The Decision,” where LeBron is coming to Miami, and the “Heatles” get built up. How did you transition to building the team from the ground up to the entirety of the basketball world wanting to come to Miami?

Shit, I was almost outta here — they ain’t have no money left. I was about gone. They wasn’t saving enough for me. They just wanted the big boys. They wasn’t thinking about me, the only one who was was [Wade]. He understood my importance to this city and franchise and thank God he did because it paid off. I don’t care what nobody say, I had my moments and we don’t win none of those rings without me. I did my job and that’s all you can do: Stay ready so you don’t have to get ready. I had some critical moments where I had to step in and hold down the fort. Thank God [Wade] stood up and said, “we need this motherfucker.” Because sometimes people get caught up in dollar signs and what makes “cents” doesn’t always make sense.

You can surround guys who drive the bus, who sit on the bus, but if you ain’t got somebody who can change the tires and the oil, your bus ain’t moving. You need a guy like me: who will do the dirty work, take that charge, do the things that won’t show up on the statsheet but it equals winning. [Wade] understood that, LeBron understood that, [Bosh] understood that. If they didn’t, it’s no way those guys take less money and cut off a piece of their pie for me to stay. They didn’t know me. They didn’t have to do that. But they understood what I brought to the table and I was able to deliver.

What’s one of your favorite stories from “The Heatles” era?

We were in Toronto one time and we had just gone on a run and we were leaving, and we went to a sports bar. We had drinks and wine and Shane [Battier] stood up and gave this classic speech. At the end of the speech he said “we gotta continue to touch the people.” And we all laughed. It was so much fun: we went on that 27 game winning streak and we forgot to have fun in that shit, dog. It was not fun. It became about the streak, the media coverage before the game and the walls were closing in. That was the first time it happened. After we won in Toronto, we got back to having fun. Now, we were a lil’ tipsy. But we got back to fun. We got back to the other shit that wasn’t about basketball.

Were there any times you had to be the bodyguard for the Big Three?

We were all walking from grabbing something to eat one day, and some dude shouted, “Hey LeBron,” and Bron looked over, and soon as he did the dude said “fuck you!” to Bron. Dude said that to Bron outta nowhere! So, now I’m walking. And in my mind, I’m saying to myself, “I’ll never let that happen again here.” And then I understood what he goes through because if someone randomly does that to me going down the street I don’t know what’ll happen. If this the shit he gotta deal with, I’ma have his back. I said, “Fuck you!” back to the dude. Bron ain’t say nothing.

Was it sad for you when the team broke up and everyone went their separate ways?

It was definitely sad. I don’t think any of us envisioned it ending that way. All of us could’ve done things differently, but I don’t regret none of it. It was an amazing ride, but no one thought it would end that way. We had so much success and we’re all still friends…

Six years later, you challenged the entire NBA when you made the finals as an underdog in the bubble. What happened during that summer?

When we first walked in the bubble I let my guys know: get comfortable with being uncomfortable. I set the tone for my guys: I slept on the couch. I wanted to be the first one to make myself uncomfortable. I ordered a whole load of Campbell’s Soup and a bunch of snacks that I like, and got a little water bottle and filled it up with a little Hennessy, and had a lil’ Tequila on the side. I tapped into that dark place to go out there and get it done. I didn’t speak to nobody. I only stayed in my room or played cards with Jimmy [Butler]. Even LeBron, as much as I love Bron, I didn’t hang out with Bron one time in the bubble. My guys need to understand what we’re here for. They’re young: they don’t need to see me kickin’ it with Bron, playing cards with Bron. We here for a reason. I want to beat Bron. I don’t need you confused! They don’t understand how I can kick it with somebody and wanna rip they head off.

I ain’t leave my room. I ain’t fraternize with nobody. And for three, four months, it was just about that. What pisses me off, man, is that people discredit what [the Heat] did in the bubble because we didn’t have a great season the very next season. Don’t get mad at me because your favorite team and favorite player was a mental midget in the bubble. Trying to fry chicken and have pool parties and shit, we ain’t here for that. Ain’t our fault motherfuckers was soft!...why discredit us? The Lakers ain’t make the playoffs the next season either and ain’t nobody sayin’ shit about them!...that takes nothing away from what we did the year before. Doesn’t change that Milwaukee swept us last year, we still beat they ass two years ago! It’s still in the record books! They whipped our ass and we whipped their ass.

What were your best and worst fights over the last 20 years?

Worst fight? Me and Gary Payton got into it at practice once. I don’t know what we were talking about, but shit went left. We started arguing and Gary went and got a broomstick! Pat [Riley] kicked us outta practice. We had a game that night and me and Gary didn’t speak the whole game. He was finna hit me wit’ a broomstick!

Best fight? Probably the one when Shaq and Pat got into it. It wasn’t even a fight, they were just going at it. The fight was me trying to hold Shaq back and he threw me like a sack of potato chips...I’m trying to save Pat’s old ass and Shaq grabbed me and swung me. He threw me down like that and I was just trying to stop him. Imagine if he really wanted a piece of me? I would’ve had to tase him!

What are you trying to prove in Year 19?

I’m trying to get another chip… I want to continue to move the needle. It’s very weird how it happens, but I impact winning. My job is to impact winning, just because it ain’t the way you like it or understand it on the basketball court, doesn’t matter. All those guys who haven’t got [a ring] that deserve one, I want to get ‘em one. I want to show ‘em what it takes. Jimmy Butler deserves a fucking championship. He almost killed himself in the bubble, he deserves one. I want to help them get one.